Getting Old

Getting old is interesting,

to say the least.

You feel the antics of your youth,

in your neck and back,

especially in winter.

You watch the ill-conceived dreams of early adulthood

sail smoothly away,

and you fondly bid them, “adieu.”

 

You lose more battles than you win

the world is darker than you remember it

 

but on the plus side,

life is beautiful, despite all the crap

you still worry, especially about bills and health

and friends and family,

but you do so with the knowledge that you have survived these

seasons before

 

By God’s grace, you can do it again

 

And, where before it took fanfare and lights

and bells and whistles to arouse and excite

Now it takes only the simplest things:

a sunset, a cup of coffee or bottle of beer

at the end of a long day,

holding the hand of the person you love,

who has loved you even in your darkest hours

 

the demons of yesteryear still call

but now you’re old enough not to cry and hide,

but to flip them off without giving a damn

and going about your way.

 

God is still good, as He always was

and always will be

You look forward to meeting Him

but are in no rush.

You learn to take your time,

love yourself, wish well for others,

even those who piss you off.

 

And life goes on, because life always will

with or without you,

and you’re pretty okay with that.

Being Vague

Being vague is an ice cream cone,

appealing in appearance

but quick to melt away.

 

Being vague is a like naming a destination,

but not supplying a road map

on how to get there.

 

Being vague is like watching a movie

after reading a book,

and saying to yourself,

“that’s nothing like I actually had in mind.”

 

Being specific is awkward

and nerve-wracking.

It limits your audience.

It changes the conversation

from something generic

to something unique &

individualized.

 

Specific problems

have specific solutions.

Specific goals

have specific means to achieve them.

 

Yes, being vague will get you more “likes”

but being specific will get more results,

more ultimate satisfaction in life.

 

You are free to choose either,

just choose wisely =)

“To Sleep, Perchance to Dream”

Ever had a nightmare where

You go to school with no clothes on?

Well, what if it isn’t a nightmare at all,

But rather a dream.

A dream in which you stand up to give your presentation

And everyone gasps,

But then you turn and say,

“That’s right, this is me, all of me. Here I am.”

And then everyone cheers,

Because you were completely

And unashamedly yourself

And who wouldn’t love the FREEDOM

To be just that?

Facing Regret

Hey everybody,

How we doing today?

Ever have a situation you wish you would have done better with? I’ve had lots. In fact, I envy anyone who boasts of having none. (I pray they are telling the truth on the matter, rather than trying to live up to a “no regrets” bumper sticker motto they saw once.) Here are two situations that come vividly to mind:

  1. There once was a young woman who used to come into my work dressed rather provocatively. A lot of men at work, customers and employees, used to get all hot and bothered by it. They had their own individual reasons. I personally wasn’t too worked up by it. Sure,  I understand that men are visual creatures, and society has its “modesty” standards. Still, at that time, I didn’t mind it. She wasn’t my daughter or sister or mother or anything other than my friend and customer. I was happy she was happy, and she did in fact seem happy. Some, I suppose, dress this way out of lack of self-confidence. She seemed to do it out of an abundance of confidence. More power to her! But people talk, and say all kinds of things. One day, somebody said something mean to her about what she was wearing. I personally never heard the comment, but she came to me and asked my opinion about her appearance nevertheless. I gave some blanket, nothing answer that tended toward the more conservative side. Now, I don’t know if you’ve ever had the feeling where you wish you had a least one person on your side in an argument, especially when you have your back up against the wall. Well, in that situation, I didn’t have hers, and I never got the chance to have it. She never returned to my workplace, and I never saw her again. I hope wherever she is, she feels beautiful and valued. If we ever meet, I hope to get the chance to saw as much. Sometimes, we just gotta set our opinions aside to  just be human.
  2. In another situation, a friend of mine’s mother died suddenly (the anniversary of her passing is coming up soon, in fact). She was an awesome woman. Her death came as a shock to us all. The service was held within the week. My friend sent me a text at the last minute, asking to come. I was afraid that if I just bolted from work, I would lose my job. So, I didn’t go. This friend is one of the most accepting people I know, and she took my absence in stride. But, seriously, some friend I am. Sometimes in life you just gotta risk that plush job to do what needs to be done.

I’ve let other people down, often times by been too afraid to do what’s right. If you picked up from the last blog, I tend towards cowardice and conservatism. I acknowledge that fault, accept that mistake. I’ll work on correcting it in the future. In the meantime, I’ll take my lumps, own my failures, and use them as teaching lessons for next time.

If you are down on yourself for your past mistakes, I pray you do not let them get the better of you. As Rafiki from Lion King says…

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Do not lose hope! Tomorrow will be brighter. Just keep going.

Love,

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